The blogosphere is full of mothers who use the network to share their experiences and advise other women who have or are about to have a child. Mother’s bloggers who have become essential opinion leaders and which is used for help.

New Stage

Before telling you how our new stage as parents is, I want to give you an explanation of why we suddenly disappeared both from the blog and Instagram as from all social networks.

All those who follow me or follow you know that this blog emerged when we started looking for pregnancy and during that time we had an abortion. When we got pregnant again, I started talking about it especially on Instagram. I was super happy because we had finally achieved it and I loved sharing that joy with people who did not know me since no one around me knew about the pregnancy until three months.

At the beginning of the pregnancy (indeed at the beginning, in the middle and at the end because that fear you never lose it) I was scared. I was afraid that something would go wrong. First, I thought that when I was told in the Echo of 12 weeks that everything was going well, I would lose that fear, but not at all. Then I postponed it to the Echo of 20 ” When the 20 o’clock arrives I’ll be better”, I repeated to myself. The Echo of 20 weeks arrived and thanked God everything went well, so the fear was displaced for 7 months … ” Well if born with seven months, although premature has many options to go well”  And so throughout the pregnancy.

The fact is that, during the first quarter I was sharing my progress on Instagram, something I do not regret because I met beautiful people (Sole, Una mama arquitecta, From the day I said yes, that goes for you. in you these months  ) perform also surpassed me. And I explain why I reach a point where I could not do more.

I already told you that I lived my pregnancy with fear for everything. Luckily I had a wonderful pregnancy: I did not have nausea, I did not have dizziness, I did not vomit, everything felt good, I was not tired … it was great. So high that the first quarter worried me.

We have always been sold the image that pregnancy is synonymous with discomfort. If we imagine a pregnant woman, the first thing that comes to mind is a girl vomiting in the voter’s cup. Well, I was not one of those.

Every time I went on Instagram and saw the pictures of girls who had gotten pregnant more or less when I, all or 99% had nausea, they were fatal, they did not want to eat … we go “the typical” Every time I saw that I worried more. And the worst was not that, and the worst was the comments of the people “If you have nausea is that everything goes great” “Do not worry about having many symptoms, what is worrying is not having them” “If you wake up dizzy is normal.”

Well, I did not have any of that, so I started getting overwhelmed. I thought “normal” was being wrong, and if I was okay it was something was wrong, so I decided to leave. I decided that I had to dedicate myself solely and exclusively to my pregnancy, to my baby and not to read comments that all they could do was hurt me and doubt myself. And that’s why I left. I did not want to know anything, nor did I want to read anything.

Now, looking back, I realize that I did well, very well. I think we are not aware of the extent to which we judge other people, to what extent we say phrases that we take as absolute truths even though we have no idea.

I remember that in week 10 I bought the Angel Sound. The best I could do. I uploaded a photo saying that I had heard the heart and a girl told me what if she was sure, that it could not be the heart, that it was very soon.

I defended myself by saying that of course, it was, but I was scared thinking that maybe I had made a mistake. And that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I decided to take some time for myself and my baby, without external influences, without stress, without thinking that the rest of the women were vomiting while I was so comfortable in my chair, so the rest of the women were going to go great and me fatal.

I decided to take a distance, and it was the best I could do. And now with my baby in my arms, everything looks different. Be the mother I want to be, I know how I want to act, and the comments do not matter.

With what happened to me, I learned. I learned that many women have a terrible time without necessity, that what is established as “normal” may not be “normal” for you. I learned that what works for 90% of people does not have to work for the remaining 10% and above all, I learned that pregnancy is a very complex emotional moment and that no woman has the “right” to judge another or to do testament of your opinions.

So from now on, we open a new stage as parents that we are enjoying mogollon because it is beautiful and we are super happy to share stories with everyone who wants to read us.

I’ve been disconnected from the blog for a long time. But it’s for good reasons. The wedding is approaching, and we have to finalize details

Those little things we’ll leave for another post.

Today I wanted to tell you how we are after the 4th attempted post-abortion.

Right now we are entirely in the 4th attempt. Duties made and waiting, to see how we are given this month but well, seen the sight without much hope, and I tell you that we are FIV cannon fodder or any other type of safe external aid. Or not, because there are also people who take a little longer and run out of problems.

The fact is that, as we do not know what kind of couple we are going to be, if we need those who need help or if in the end, they get it naturally, we have decided that we have to start thinking about what to do.

This month a year ago we officially started with the search. I say formally because before that, in May, we began to “prove” but without knowing everything we know now of fertile days, etc. I told you on Instagram that this weekend we had made a trip to Edinburgh. Well, we have taken the opportunity to gather strength for the wedding and to talk about the future.

And … how do we see the future? Well evidently being three minimum, good 5 with the Perris, hahaha.

We have decided that in January we will begin to do tests, to see what they tell us and besides that, we will start the procedures to adapt depending on what they tell us. This decision has been critical and much debated.

The issue of adoption is complicated for me. I think that when a couple decides to adopt because they do not “have any other choice” because their other options to be parents are over, it is somewhat “selfish,” I feel a bit selfish, and I explain why.

When you adopt, you are giving the option of a better life for a child. If you can have a child naturally or with the help of science, sometimes adoption does not even go through your head, so that a child who could have a better future will remain in a center waiting for someone to adopt him because you, having your children, are already “not interested” in taking.